Tuesday, September 8, 2009

those four scary little letters!!!!


Don't know whether it brings thoughts of whips chains, cages, ball gags, etc. but seems to make people shudder and run.

Sure, that can be part of it, but it's certainly not all. Mike and i don't have ANY of that.

To me, bdsm just incorporates so much more than just the bend and whack of just spanking... which is great by the way!! ... but, there is sooooo much more to explore and enjoy.

Recent talks in chat as well as one reader's question about the oil is what got me to thinking about it.(will get to the oil :) )

It doesn't all have to be about making a girl as uncomortable as possible thru pain and pretzel positions. For us it's all about the sensuous nature of what we do. Of course, some pain is involved in spanking and i have looked in the mirror the next day and seen the marks and thought "holy crap! That was all in fun??!!" But, while it's going on there is soooo many other sensations, that even the pain is drowned out...if that makes sense.

Some of what we have/do that ISN"T just spanking :

blindfold: If you haven't tried it, DO! Wow! Not being able to "see what's coming" is an EXQUISITE torture lol

candles... Not the beeswax, pariffan store bought candles. These were professionally made by a great friend and trusted woman in the scene for many years. Made from soy and designed to melt at lower temperature so its just VERY warm and not burning. Absolutely amazing! And, get this the wax can be massaged into the skin like a silky lotion! Terrific when combined with blindfold and...

ice: The effect of ice and heat of candles is amazing! (i know! i overuse that word. But, sometimes the sensations are hard to put into words) and sometimes when you are really on edge and every nerve is alive and screaming with the sensuous torture of it all, you cant tell hot from cold at times!

oil: Ok. This is actually something Mike invented after we saw some massage oil at an adult store. He said he could make something a lot better and turned the kitchen into a laboratory. He finally perfected this recipe of

olive oil
ground habenero pepper
ground ginger
ground cinnamon
and has it warming in a crockpot all day

When we get back on our feet financially, we are thinking of selling it (of course i've probably just shot that idea to hell giving away the secret ingredients) that's how good this stuff is.

The sensation of it is INCREDIBLE especially on the more errrr "sensitive" parts! And on spanked skin its like streaks of very mild fire that can drive you up a wall!

stockings and pantyhose: My old ones..that have runs or lost a lot of elasticity. We use these for "restraints". i LOVE it... so soft, and no marks lol.

These are just SOME of the things we use and have. And see??!! No whips, back breaking positions, blood, rope burns, etc. Just ecstacy.

And thats bdsm. For us. Call it the lighter side of things, but sure doesn't need to be scary :).


Every house has a main water shut off valve for emergencies.

Next time he takes a shower, keep peeking in.

Soon as he is all shampooey and soapy, quick run and shut it off!

... variation on this

every water heater has a valve that shuts off the outflow of water from it...turn it off instead of the main water valve

sorry i havent been posting... i really do aprreciate everyone reading and making such kind comments.

i will try to write more...it's just real life is "intruding" big time at the moment


  1. Amber...I've been a lurker since you started....and thanks for the recipe!


    I agree...BDSM is not all about gags and chain and drinking out of a bowl on the floor and blood...in fact I am not into that!

    But hot wax, knife play, flogging, electrics (violet wands esp) and fire play...ooohhhh lala! Bring it on!

    Hope you don't mind but I've added you to my blog roll!

  2. HAHAHA that joke should be fun when i visit paul, planning on spending a week at his in Feb...grinssss....

    Love the blog, the side i loved


  3. oh and Paul if you read this.....errr im not planning anything..... sniggers and coughs

    grins thanks amber

  4. Oh i know ive commented twice already but, i love that side of BDSM, so much more sensual... your write, its not all about whips and chains..theres a lot more to it than meets the eye

  5. u r so lucky, amber

    i m so looking for a relationship like u guys have.

    please try 2 post more. this is 1 of the best blogs i have read

  6. sara...im glad you enjoy it and no i dont mind at all and i will try to read yours as well :)

    sally... sounds like Paul is in for an unforgettable time lol....and you too of course...grinnnns

    allison... i will try...i promise :)